Our final birth control

Yes, I did get permission before writing this blog and there is nothing in here that my husband doesn't already know.

Let me start by saying I love my husband. Birth control for the most part has mostly been up to the woman to take care of, which in my opinion should not always be the case. I was probably asked 100 times through out this pregnancy, "so what are you going to do for birth control?" And my response was, "well, that depends on how the babies are delivered." Since we knew from the beginning of our marriage that we wanted 3 kids and we ended up with 4, we knew without a doubt that we were done. Bryan and I had always talked about him getting a vasectomy, and though he wasn't 100% about getting one, he also was not against it. For me, I thought it was only fair that when the time came to close up shop, that he would be the one to do it. I mean really, it's only fair, since I had to carry the kids, push the kids out, and breastfeed. I didn't think it was too much to ask.

When it came close to the birth of the twins I got the name of a doctor, who is quite famous in the Rochester area for vasectomies, from a friend who got it done last year. After doing some internet searching about this doctor, and reading nothing but raving reviews, I thought this guy is the one. So, I click on the next link down, hoping that it would pop up a contact number and what do I see? This guys obituary! So, I call my friend to verify that it's the same guy, and he says, "I think so because the guy I say was like 80 years old and I was nervous in the beginning because he came at me with a shaky hand." Needless to say I found a random doctor that could fit Bryan in early enough so that he could heal before his recreational volleyball session started (he thinks he's the stuff, but I like to remind him that it's recreational). So yeah, the time came and even though I was the one to make the first appointment, he followed through and got it done.

The day before the procedure he needed to shave, and for those of you who don't know my husband, he quite hairy. Even though I was willing to shave more of the area for him, he was adamant that I didn't need to shave all of it. When the day of the appointment rolled around he took his sister with him (just in case he couldn't drive... only Bryan would do that), when he got back he said," I should have let you shave more, because the nurse came in and had to shave more and she wasn't gentle about." My exact words, "I'm sorry, but I told you to let me shave more." (Like many men, Bry has to learn things the hard way.) He asked me if I wanted to see it, which I declined, I had no desire to see anything. Anyway, I was more than willing to baby him the first day and even the second day, but after days 3, 4, and 5? Is it wrong of me to say suck it up? Don't get me wrong, I know it must be a bit painful, but so is pushing out a baby and I still had to do stuff.

Now, he is back at work and he can't do any extreme bouncing around for a few weeks, I will be happy when he is back to normal. I don't know how much longer I can take the slow walking, excessive sighing and the damn tightie whities (it would be one thing if he looked like Michael Jordan in them.)

I wrote this blog with a lot of sarcasm because that's how I am. I love my husband deeply and completely. I have a lot of respect for the man, that is man enough, to let me air his business about something so personal and for doing what others may not out of love for me.

Going from 2 to 4

I've been writing this blog in my head for a week now, and I've finally gotten the chance to blog it.

When I found out that I was expecting twins I was extremely scared about taking on two babies on top of a toddler and a 5 year old. I tried to prepare myself as much as possible by talking to people with twins, doing internet searches of tips to raising twins, and looking up Youtube videos of how to breastfeed twins (yes, they do exist). I got a lot of different advice from a lot of different people. Some parents advised that I not attempt to breastfeed because it would be too demanding, some said that organization was key, having a schedule was a must. Some people said that I probably would not be able to return to work, or that I really need to look into having a sitter.

The thing is, is that everyone has an opinion and though I never bashed the advice given, whether asked for or not, I already had a game plan. I was definitely going to breastfeed both boys exclusively for the first 12 months, there was no way I was not returning to work (especially since I only work part time and though I love my family I still need a break). Sure I would love to find someone to watch my kids every once in awhile, it's not a priority since we really don't have money to go out anyway and when we do we'd rather go as a family. The schedule thing I'm pretty good at, but I still nurse on demand for the most part. The one thing I am not good at, and probably never will be is organization. I try to stay on top of things but that never lasts too long but I don't have a conniption about it.

One of the best bits of advice that I got was that sometimes someone or everyone will be crying and that that's ok. I've been on my own only a few times with either 3 or 4 kids and I've been amazed that everything went smoothly. Sure there were tears, tantrums and disappointments, but at the end of the day everyone's needs were met. I can say that I'm proud of myself for not pulling my hair out with all the chaos that happens and for keeping my cool. I would have to say that I've worked very hard at letting go of certain things in exchange for others and at doing the best I can with what I have. Yes, I still cry when I'm overwhelmed, and I get snippy when I'm tired, but I take my 5 minutes then count my blessings, pull myself together and keep on going. Sure having 4 kids requires a little more juggling than two, but it's not as difficult as I was expecting it to be.

Of course, like I said earlier I've only been alone with the kids a few times thanks to all the help of friends and family, so I may change my mind... I'll let you know if that happens. Either way I take it one day at a time.