Before and after delivery

I've been wanting to write this blog for some time, but I've been rather busy lately. It's probably going to be a fairly long post just so you know.

Weeks before I delivered the boys I was preparing myself for the labor, though this was not my first pregnancy, I was still just as terrified of the birthing process as I was the first time. I tried not to set my expectations for vaginal and medication free delivery too high, considering baby b was refusing to turn heads down and depending on who the doctor on call was would determine whether I would have a vaginal delivery or a c-section. Anyway, I started watching the video of my delivery with Jackie as a refresher. Now, I've watched this brief clip several times, but I usually can not watch it with the volume on (it makes me cringe). However, to have a better reminder of the pain of having a baby, I turned on the volume and watched it several times over, amazed at what the female body could do and petrified that I would have to do it again with twins.

I knew my time was drawing near when I began to lose pieces of my mucus plug and the braxton-hicks contractions were becoming more frequent and stronger. I pushed through work, only calling in one day. When the weekend arrived I stayed home while Bryan drove 3 hours to meet his parents half way and bring back Jackie (I wanted my family together before the babies came) and I made sure that if anything happened I would have a ride to the hospital. I didn't do too much that day because I was easily tired and my back was killing me, not to mention I was having about 3-5 contractions every hour (nothing I thought to be labor inducing). Bryan finally got home around 4pm and I was over-joyed that Jackie was home after being away 8 weeks. Even though she was a bit stand-offish towards me, I picked her up and cuddled her anyway. I knew that I should probably have been resting, but there was no way I was not going to do what I could to get Jackie re-acquainted with her mama. Remy was just as excited to introduce Jackie to his friends next door, so I got myself together and took Jackie outside to play with the boys. I thought that I would be able to sit and watch for the most part, but for those of you with little kids you know how impossible that really is. Since Bryan left to run an errand I became the go to person, bringing out ice water, pulling out toys, and I even found myself playing a short game of tug-o-war (and yes, I pulled 3 boys ranging in age from 4-7 to the end for the win. I'll admit to having a little help from the leader of the group, 7-yr old Devon.) This playing carried on for maybe 30-40 minutes before I really needed to lay down and rest and Bryan took over playing with the kids.

So, the day went on with me taking frequent rests in bed and spending time with the family. I finally went to sleep around 9pm and woke up at 1am to tell Bry that I think we should think about heading to the hospital, but I needed to call the doctor first. The conversation with the doctor went something like this:

                                   me: Hi, I think I'm in labor, but I'm not sure.
                                   dr.: Are you having contractions and if so how far apart?
                                   me: Yes, but they are not consistent maybe 5-8 every hour.
                                   dr.: Has your water broken?
                                   me: No, but I've had some bloody show.
                                   dr.: Since you are having twins why don't you come on in.

So, I called a friend to see if she could come and watch the kids, but she suggested I bring them to her house. After talking to Bry about what we needed to do, it was becoming more apparent that I needed to get to the hospital quickly. Since, this friend lived about 20min away, I decided to call another friend who lived around the corner (I felt bad asking them because they have 3 small children of there own and Jackie can be quite the handful), and it was decided that the husband, Chris, would come and sit at the house for us. So, we finally left for the hospital around 2am and got there about 2:30am. I normally would have walked to triage, but this time I made Bryan wheel me up because the contractions were stronger and I didn't want the walk to make it worse.

After we got checked in and they got me hooked up to the monitors, they did an ultrasound to determine the location of the babies (A was head down, but B was still transverse). The doctor came in to discuss the delivery options: deliver baby A and then she would try to turn baby B, if that didn't work she would reach in and pull him down by his legs, and the last result would be a c-section. Mind you I am still having contractions, but if I had to rate it from 1-10 with 10 being the worse, I would probably say they were about a 5 or 6, just enough to make me pinch my lips and not talk. So finally, the doctor says, "well lets check your cervix and see what's going on," and that was when the chaos started. She says, " Oh my God, you're 9 1/2 cm and the baby's head is right there! We need to get her to a room now!" Because of the possibility of a c-section I needed to have a pain med, but it was too late for an epidural, so I received a spinal block (similar to an epidural but acts immediately and lasts less than 2 hours. I'll tell you, in all honesty, I'm glad I got it for this delivery but I'm glad I never got something like that with the other two. Because I had trouble arching my back it took awhile and I received a few sharp pains down my right leg, but when she finally got right, it was amazing how fast it worked. I literally couldn't feel anything. I pushed maybe four or five times before baby A, Zane Luis, was born at 4:15am. I had no idea how hard or for how long I needed to push because like I said, I couldn't feel anything, I just tried to remember how I pushed for Remy and Jackie and mimic it. Then it came time for baby b, he refused to be turned so the doctor reached up and with the help of an ultrasound she got his feet and delivered him feet first. I remember thinking the whole time, please God, let them get him out ok. Zander Leslie was born four minutes after his brother at 4:19am. So yeah, I'm glad I got that spinal block because I don't know if I could have suffered through the extraction of the second baby, Bryan told me later that when he saw what they were doing to me that he wasn't sure if he was going to make it. Two main things played a part in me not getting a c-section (which, I was absolutely terrified of having): 1) the doctor, she was confident of doing a breach delivery and of pulling the baby down, while some doctors aren't. And 2) the fact that baby A was much larger than baby B and therefore opened the way for his brother.

So, now that I am finally home, I must say that I have never been happier. Though it is very hard and I can't even begin to think about caring for the 4 children on my own, I would not change anything for the world. However, I am extremely grateful for all the friends and family who have shared their words of encouragement, offered their time and have planned to help whenever and however they can. I'm very emotional these days and find myself brought to tears by the kindness of others, for those that know me, I am not one that reaches out for help trying always to do things on my own. So thank you to everyone near and far for being there for me and my family through this wonderful, yet difficult time. I swear you all are killing me with kindness.

 Below are two pictures, one of me the night we left for the hospital and the other of me 4 days after delivery. And yes, I still look pregnant and I probably will for awhile, but I am happy to be 21 lbs lighter.