I'm just saying...

I have to write this post because it just keeps happening to me.

Okay, let me give you the run down. During the week my typical day starts between 7-7:30am when the little boys wake up (I don't count when Jackie wakes up at 5am because Bryan usually deals with her). I have enough time to use the bathroom, but that doesn't always mean time to brush my teeth. Then I'm changing diapers, nursing babies and making breakfast. While breakfast is cooking I'm letting out the dog and feeding both the dog and the cats. While all of this is going on I'm making sure the babies and Jackie stay out of trouble, and that Remy is up and getting ready for school. Then I get Remy fed and out the door. It is now 8:30am and time to feed the twins. It usually takes me about 30 minutes to feed and clean up the twins sometimes longer depending on what they eat, so now it's 9am. If I'm lucky my breakfast is still hot when I eat it. Usually around the time that I'm done eating Jackie is hungry and wants a snack.

So yes, even though I have been up for two hours that doesn't mean I'm "dressed."

As you all know it's been a very hot summer (and even spring) and we have no central air, so my pajamas consist of booty shorts and a tank top, sometimes it may be yoga pants or leggings and a t-shirt, but even still... If I don't have time to brush my teeth that usually means I haven't had time to comb my hair, which for me as a black woman with natural hair, well... you get the picture. Should I also mention that sometimes I'm not wearing a bra, or is that too much information? Let's also not forget that I've breastfed 4 babies and I'm over the age of 30 so things definitely do not look the same as when I was 20. (I don't mean to give such an unsettling image, but in order for you to fully understand the horror, I've got to be honest, right?)

So, that's what I look like in the morning (and sometimes the afternoon on days where I don't have work, LOL) now let me give you a visual of the kids. Jackie is usually only in panties, if I'm lucky an over-sized t-shirt (she loves to were mine and Remy's old shirts) if I'm not lucky she will appear naked and I'll have to trick her back into clothes. She may or may not have a messy face, she usually always has messy hair, since she hates to have anything in her hair), and sometimes she may have pen, marker, or stickers some where on her body. The little boys maybe either in just a shirt and diaper or just a diaper. They may or may not have a messy face and hands, and they may or may not be screaming and crying. Let's not forget the dog, who is usually following a baby cleaning up fallen crumbs.

I'll say it's now around 10am and just before I can get the chaos under control, there comes a knock on the door. In my head I'm thinking, "Really?!, Ugh!" Now, let me give you a visual of what it looks like when I open the door.


When there is a knock on the door Bella gives 1-2 very loud barks and runs to the door. At this point there is nothing I can do about anything, sometimes I try to fix my pony tail and make sure my boobs aren't hanging but both of those things are usually pointless now. I open the door while telling Bella to back up, but I guess this is when she pleads her senior citizen status and runs out to sniff whoever knocked. While I'm apologizing for the dog Jackie makes an appearance followed by both babies. As I'm trying to pay attention to the person at the door I'm also trying to make sure the kids don't escape. I end up with a baby on one hip and holding the others hand, that's when the smell hits me and I realize that someone has a poopy diaper. As I'm standing at the door looking a hot mess and my kids looking like no one loves them I'm hoping that the baby I'm holding doesn't pull my shirt down and that this stranger would hurry up and get to the point so that I can politely say, "I'm sorry but we have 4 children and currently have no money for whatever it is you are selling."

This happens to me about once a week and some of you are probably thinking how come you haven't learned, but guess what? I have learned. I've learned to own it! If you don't want to see me in all my morning glory then don't knock on my door before 1pm. If you see a minivan in someone's driveway and you're knocking at their door then chances are high that they have small children and don't have time to talk about magazine subscriptions. I don't know about everyone else, but my kids in the morning are busy and I don't have time to waste!